Friday, July 14, 2006

Ok, Im gonna starf with a few simple ELF-facts.
Elf sex is possibly the safest sex on earth. They dont carry sexually transmitted diseases and you cant get pregnant or make an Elverine pregnant unless you both want to, which is not unheard of.
And YES there are female elves, elverines. And theyre HOT HOT HOT, even to girls. That reminds me: All elves are bisexual, but guys and girls not ready for some same sex action dont worry, no elf will do anything you dont want to. They can sense your longings and not-longings.
And you, Anonymous painter from New York. Im so happy for you, there are probably not many humans in the world so lucky to experience a relationship with both a fairy and a mermaid. Im very curious, are they at all similar to my descriptions of elves? please send me your pics of your paintings to hallgerdur@lhi.is and I can post them on the blog.

6 Comments:

Blogger kristin said...

But, praytell, where do we find such wonderful beings? They're not in my panties, I'll tell you that much.

4:46 AM  
Blogger Mokki litli said...

Vá, ég var að lesa rifrildið í commentunum hér fyrir neðan. Vá hvað sumt fólk er stórfenglegt.
Heyrðu, það vantar bókina þína niður í upplýsingamiðstöð, við erum búin með hana. Er kannski ekki von á annari prentun?

2:55 PM  
Anonymous Blackswan said...

Hæ Hallgerður
vonandi er i lagi að ég skrifa á ensku, af því íslenskan min er enn ekki svo goð. Ég er dönsku, en bý á Ísland núna, og ég er med margir spurningar :

Before I go any further, so as not to be misunderstood in my questions, I would like to say that I know elves exist from experience, albeit not of the very direct character you write about in your blog. So if the whole thing is just a big joke you will probably have a good laugh on my account from this mail (which is ok, because I know what I know). My reservations about whether or not you are serious primarily stems from the fact that I would never write blogs about this if it happened to me. Then again, I wouldn't write blogs about my sexlife in general, and have a natural distrust of people who seems to feel a need to do so - sorry.


HOWEVER, if you are serious, I am really curious :
My own personal experience with elves is that :
1) You cant really say that they are separate from nature, but all the same they are still beings in and of themselves
2) they can be heard but I have never seen one - except out of the corner of my eye, which might just be a mindtrick because I really WANT to see them (but at the same time is a bit affraid).
3) in my minds eye - eg. when I meditate - I can talk to them quite freely - however then it all happens in what would popularly be called 'inside my mind' - though I sometimes find that the distinction between 'inside' and 'outside' world is sometimes very fluctuating. This (in my opinion) is the 'veil' that is often talked about, between the Tir Nan Og and our world.
My most direct experience of elves has been by the feeling that someone stroke my hair (back in Denmark actually, so your assumption that elves only exist in Iceland is wrong) and then I have been pushed in the back by one, up here, while standing in a blót-cirkel (apparently it wanted me to go out the western entrance of the circle). It was very strange, but I know what I experienced.

I would like to know how you yourself perceive your experiences - as concrete and material happenings, the same way as if you had sex with a human? or as something the nature of which is more hard to define, eg. if it happens in your inner or outer world seems to be the same thing?
Also, why would you write about it in a blog? If it is really just all natural to you, eg. this is just your everyday sexlife, then why put it on display?

With hopes of answers, Blackswan

5:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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Offshore Honk Honk

2:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, I know a few elven souls. and they're definitely hot. unfortunately, the idea of sex with me fills the land with elven laughter.

4:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Really surprised anyone else besides me knows that much about them. They aren't called "the hidden folk" without reason. About being "bi" there are a few that are devoted straight/gay but, yes, most are "bi." And they can't auto-guess your sexual desires. There are several types of elf races (kinda like there are different races of humans). Sex for the "low elves" is an olfactory stimulus. Where for humans it's visual stimulus. "High elves" (tall ones) are very much like humans and it is visual for them. Btw, the low elves are herbivore (not vegan); they CAN get mad cow disease. "Tree & Wood Elves" are related to low elves but aren't herbivore to my knowledge. The drow will sex you up but kill you while they're at it. Elves may seem to guess sexual desire but they've just been at doing the do (long life spans) longer and more often than humans; and they can be perfectionists at even simple things let alone something as important as sex. That means a virgin elf has just as much stumbling newness as a human their first time. High elves are mostly straight but will marry for politics (if not gone rogue).

I am Jem Fay Crystal; gamer and internet junky.

12:13 AM  

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